Do you remember as a child the hopes and dreams and fantasies ? How many of them came true for you? Were they unrealistic ones? Were they acheivable or really silly ones that only a childs mind could conjure up?

Do you remember reaching puberty? That age when you are asked probably one of the most important questions that would be posed in your lifetime.... "What are your goals/plans for your future"?
Why does society expect you to make such an important decision at what is likely to be the most confusing time in your life? Gawddd when I think back, I didnt have a clue! All I
was concerned about was 'fashion, boys, movies, rock groups, boys, and trying to find my niche in the social circles., oh yeah and did I mention boys? HOW UNFAIR! to be expected to KNOW what you want to be 10 - 20 years from now. Hell, I could barely remember what time I was suppose to be at school upon entering Jr.High, nevermind choosing courses to 'plan my future'. Needless to say I think I really 'missed the boat'. My parents were of the belief that if a 'girl' had 'office skills' she would be 'set for life'., or 'get a husband' was another alternative. Don't get me wrong I know their intentions were good and they truly believed that they had my 'best interest' at heart, I know they also believed that if I lacked academically it was an 'easy' way to get me through to graduation day.
I went along without much argument with what they chose for me (after all how wrong could they be?) even though my heart was leaning toward the 'arts'. When I mentioned my desire to them , the response was that there was 'no future' in that 'nonsense'. .... So here I am heading off to school each day , dreading the boring, uncreative world of typing, bookkeeping, and general business. I remember periodically popping my head inside the doors of a drama or applied design class wishing I could be part of it, trudging on to my chosen electives.

Ok to make a long story short, I graduated , worked in an office, got married, raised my kids, and Im almost divorced. So here I am 40something and experiencing puberty again, needing to make crucial decisions for my future pertaining to career choices, classes and everything else. The one blessing is that at least I kind of KNOW who I am now and what MY preferences are.

There are no more added concerns of what "crowd" to be in, about fashion, rock groups, movies, and boys (although males still do intrique me.....<smiles>..) The major concerns now are the choices for employment. At this time I am making an attempt to 'follow that dream from long ago' and persue something 'creative'. But! In the meantime do I look for employment that will pay bills or spend my time 'reaching for the stars' ?

 I am not alone in this situation, and have read about many that are successfully fulfilling their dreams, but is that the norm? How have they acheived this success? Do they have support from other areas? I am very tired of hearing how you can achieve whatever you put your mind to... well how is it done without support of some kind?

So what do you do as you reach puberty for the second time around? Do you persue those dreams or opt for a 'sure thing'?

Shan

Copyright March 2001