Changing Perspectives		

	I've been through many changes in my life over the past number of years.  From my university days, through changing employment and career paths, a wedding, two glorious sons, a nasty separation, an automotive accident.......  And I played the wrong numbers for 649, again.

	Does my life sound any different than yours?  I am sure there are various experiences to consider, but if asked to explain your present state of being, would you be positive or negative about the events that you have been through?  Would you be able to cap it off with some sort of twisted humor like the wrong lottery numbers?  Or are you so engrossed in how badly you have been treated, that you lose sight of the many wonderful things around you?

	Before I go any further, maybe I should briefly introduce myself.  My name is Jeff Davis, and I have been "interacting" with Bonnie for some time now over the internet.  Everything today is "inter" something or connected to the internet cyberspace.  (Not to be confused with the expression "cyber" that is so often used in the chat programs, and denotes a sexual connotation)  I have a sometimes warped sense of humor, okay, most times, but most days a very optimistic outlook on life in general, and the path I am on.  Some of you may have noticed my recent "mark" in the forum, where I have recently visited, read, and added to.

	Recently, I was shocked, honored, aghast, at being asked to contribute to this site in an editorial capacity.  Normally I am quite an "off the cuff" type of person, a smart a...  aleck, that's the word, but I am a listener, a logical sort, always sorting, planning, changing... and the thoughts of writing editorials for such a group was unnerving, to say the least.  Could I actually help someone?  Would my bantering benefit someone in even the most minute way?

	So, I visited the editorial archives.  Wow, I certainly am not of the same writing style as Karl, who, by the way, has written some great articles.  And I checked out the forum, and thought, heck, there are lots in here that can write editorials...  look at the thought process they have initiated.  Why ask me???  But I made a compromise, and a suggestion.  I will try a couple editorials, see how they work out, but I think there are many other "hidden" or "suppressed" talents out there, so maybe a number of "guest columnists" might be beneficial.

	Now, back to today's theme.  Changing perspectives is the occasional insertion of a guest columnist like me, or you.  It is about getting different perspectives to your issues and ideas, much like you do in the forum.  Or is that a bad assumption on my part?  Why do we write in the forum pages?  Is it to get help with our personal issues?  Is it to share our experiences with others?  Why share them, surely, they can have their own experiences.  Is it a need for feedback, the sensation of having someone to read your thoughts, understand them, and offer support?  I think it can be all of these things, and maybe more.  The truth is, no matter what your reason, as long as the forum helps you meet your needs, it is a good thing.  Thanks everyone, for sharing.

	Over the past five years, or so, of an unstable marriage (you thought Mt St. Helens was a bad eruption), and the past two years of hell trying to cope with a physical separation, particularly with my sons, and the constant battling in and out of the court room, some of my very close friends and acquaintances have questioned my ability to keep going, most often with a chuckle, joke and a smile.  I guess it is my way of coping, and right or wrong in someone else's eyes, it works for me.  How do you cope?  Do you get angry?  Quiet and reserved?  Does you blood pressure approach infinity?  Have you learned through your struggles, that there are better ways to cope, which not only get you through the situation, but, also are healthy methods for you?  Is this site, and the forum, one of those methods of coping?

	I have this theory (don't we all?).  But my theory is important, because it is mine.  And I hope you think the same way about each and every theory and idea you have.  We, all of us, are here for one primary reason.  To cope with our inner thoughts.  And I believe, that we all want some sort of feedback.  Acceptance, maybe.  And as members of this forum and site, we can each impact and be impacted by the thoughts, ideas, or comments of others.  That is what changing perspectives is all about.  Maybe by looking from an outside source, a third party venue, we can see something we missed because our emotions were clouding our senses.  You see, common sense, is not really that common, it can vary greatly from person to person.

	Despite my "attitude", I know I am a very caring person.  I know that people who know "me" look for my support, my perspective, and sometimes, even my help.  But they don't always agree with me.  And that is also a good thing, because my perspective may not always be right.  Do I have all the facts to deal with?  Do I have any idea what emotions are at stake?  It would be impossible to understand exactly what one of you are going through at any given time, but maybe, someone here, can offer a comment, some advice, a good joke, a gentle verbal kick in the butt, to allow us to change our perspective, and see things differently.  Above all, try and stay positive, poised, and headed in YOUR right direction.  Be cautious at the advise you get, but allow it to weigh in your mind, and be willing to offer your thoughts freely, as isn't that the whole purpose of this site?  And if all else fails, for a different perspective, just stand on your head, and look at the situation again.